Welcome to the 50 Best Songs of 2014. After listening to every single sound recording released this year, without bias, I have determined the 50 catchiest, provocative and just plain best songs of the year.
50. “Man of the Year” / Schoolboy Q
Jackie Treehorn treats objects like women.
49. “Doses and Mimosas” / Cherub
I tried to put this song on a playlist for my friend’s birthday. He removed it and said he didn’t want to attract what he calls the “Molly element.”
48. “Easy Rider” / Action Bronson
“I heard ya bitch still wears Ecko.” Well-played, Bronson.
47. “Lost on the Way Home” / Chromeo (feat. Solange)
Not the greatest lyricists but these boys work a groove nearly as hard as their forefathers Hall & Oates and Steely Dan.
46. “Blue Suede” / Vince Staples
As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster.
45. “Free Bread At the Outback” / Lil Dicky
Ode to the greatest mid-priced American dining chain.
44. “All About That Bass” / Meghan Trainor
43. “Mess on a Mission” / Liars
42. “Can’t Stop” / Theophilus London (feat. Kanye West)
Not gonna front, I’m just here for Kanye’s verse.
41. “No Rest for the Wicked” / Lykke Li
Actually, I get the impression that the wicked sleep quite comfortably.
40. “Lifestyle” / Richie Gang (feat. Rich Homie Quan & Young Thug)
39. “Recognize” / PARTYNEXTDOOR (feat. Drake)
Isn’t this great, my flight leaves at eight. Your flight lands at nine, my game just rewinds.
38. “Cigarette Song” / Raury
37. “One More Shot” / Stalley (feat. Rick Ross & August Alsina)
A jam so sexy even picturing Rick Ross with his shirt off can’t ruin it.
36. “Love Me Harder” / Ariana Grande (feat. The Weeknd)
35. “Say You Love Me” / Jessie Ware
No, YOU checked YOUR ex-girlfriend’s facebook page four times in the last hour.
34. “No Flex Zone” / Rae Sremmurd
These dudes look 12 years old, but sound 8.
33. “Fight Night” / Migos
32. “Red Eyes” / War on Drugs
And I’m free… FREE FAAAAAALLIN’.
31. “Loyal” / Chris Brown (feat. Lil Wayne & Tyga)
H8 U Chris!
30. “Chandelier” / Sia
29. “Benz Friendz” / Future (feat. Andre 3000)
For richer or poorer.
28. “I Don’t Fuck With You” / Big Sean (feat. E-40)
27. “Tuesday (Remix)” / I LOVE MAKONNEN (feat. Drake)
Woozy ballad about goin’ up on the most productive work day of the week.
26. “Early” / Run the Jewels
One of the best police brutality narratives ever put to song. Memo to all the post-Ferguson rappers: Protest songs don’t have to be boring.